Wednesday, May 13, 2009

When To Stay Together in a Marriage with Children

posted by Michele Olson

A Minnesota CBS affiliate station, WCCO just did a story entitled; Should Parents Stay Together For Their Kids? Reporters of the story Amelia Santaniello and Frank Vascellaro spoke with a father who had experienced a divorce. They also spoke with an expert in the field of marriage- Dr. William Doherty.

The report brings up some statistics that we have been shouting from the rooftops here at The statistic is; 2/3 of marriages that end in divorce are considered “unsatisfying, but not angry marriages." In these marriages there is no infidelity, inappropriate arguing or abuse of any kind. Unlike the remaining 1/3 of marriages that ended in divorce and did exhibit those behaviors where the kids were found to be better off if the parents divorced, the children in the 2/3 statistic were found to be seriously hurt by their parents divorce. These findings were echoed in a book the report cites by scholars Paul Amato and Alan Booth entitled A Generation at Risk: Growing up in and Era of Family Upheaval. Dr. Doherty states that the divorces in the 2/3 category tend to double the risk of academic, psychological and future relationship problems for those children. The findings are also backed up by Elizabeth Marquardt in her 2005 book Between Two Worlds-The Inner Lives of Children of Divorce.

While no parent of divorce wants to hear these statistics, and of course it’s not the inevitable course for every child, the data points out the greater probability for children in the 2/3 category. We have to consider the effect on society as a whole if divorce remains rampant.

This whole discussion is also the basis of Myth #1 in our free Marriage Myth Buster Guide. (Click here to request your free copy.)

To read the entire WCCO news story Should Parents Stay Together For Their Kids? click here…and be sure and watch the same titled video also available.

What are your thoughts on the 1/3 vs. 2/3 statistic of whether to stay married with children?

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