Thursday, September 10, 2009

Separate Beds for Lucy and Ricky and You?

posted by Michele Olson

Separate beds like…Lucy and Ricky and Rob and Laura Petrie of the Dick Van Dyke show. These and so many of the 50’s and 60’s TV couples who were not allowed to sleep in the same bed on TV may have had it right when it comes to a happy and longer marriage.

That is the conclusion of a study done by sleep researcher Dr. Neil Stanley. He found that when one partner tosses in sleep, there is a 50-50 chance the other will turn. While younger couples would be hesitant to sleep apart, older couples often have the confidence to broach a subject that could cause hurt feelings in younger couples.

Dr. Stanley offers this point: “People say that they like the feeling of having their partner next to them when they are asleep. But you have to be awake to feel that. We all know what it is like to sleep in a bed with someone and have a cuddle. But at one point you say, ‘I’m going to go to sleep now.’ Why not at that point just take yourself down the landing?”

Since this is a British publication, we Americans would probably interpret that as…when you are ready to go to sleep, go get in your own bed.

Some people may assume that two beds means a lack of intimacy, which is important for emotional health, but that doesn’t have to be the case. The London’s Daily Mail report that sleeping in separate beds can lead to a good night’s rest, which can ward off stroke, heart disease and divorce. (Think blanket hogging.)

So, Ricky doesn’t have some ‘splanin to do. Turns out he just wanted a good night’s sleep.

What do you think? Do you and your spouse sleep in separate beds? Does it lessen intimacy or increase it because of a good night’s sleep?

Full article


M. Denise Wilmer Barreto said...

Interesting concept. Not sure how I feel about this one except - I would not want it at this time in my marriage.

We are 8 years in and had a rough 2008 - we, better stated I need the reassurance of our physically closeness right now.

I won't rule it out for later in our marriage. said...

Hello M,
Thanks for the comment. I think what's interesting is that there can be reasons for couples not to sleep in the same bed, and it doesn't mean there is something wrong, it's simply for a better nights sleep and health issues.

It can open up the "taboo" idea of separate beds as some type of stigma.

Keep blogging!