Do You Hold A Grudge Against Your Spouse?

posted by Michele Olson

If you our your spouse are holding a grudge against each other, your relationship is not headed in the right direction....forward! The key is forgiveness. It's an important part of a good relationship and it will improve your marriage.

Here are five steps you can take to go toward forgiveness if there is a grudge between you and your honey.

1) Set aside time to discuss the issue.

2) Explain why you are upset

3) Tell your spouse directly that you forgive them.

4)Do your best not to bring up the issue again.

5) Remind yourself that you have already forgiven your spouse if you find yourself thinking about the issue.

Another good question to ask yourself...have I blown this out of proportion? Will this matter in five years? Work hard at finding ways that fit within your personality to remove the obstacle of a grudge in your marriage. The energy and effort it will take on your part will be well worth it.

If you find you can't have the five step discussion above, perhaps you need to learn communication and conflict resolution skills, or worth with a relationship coach. Visit thinkmarriage.org and click on the Learn tab to explore the online and in person opportunities available for you.