Posted by Michele Olson
Dr. Gail Saltz , an NBC Today show contributor recently received a question about a woman ready to marry her boyfriend of five years, but he’s hesitant to get married because the divorce rate is so high, and he is afraid of how easily people get divorced. Dr. Saltz points out that there is a reason marriage vows usually contain the words; for better or worse. She believes the fundamental question is; does her boyfriend feel he can’t make a lifelong commitment or he doesn’t know if she can?
A very important question was left out of her comments, she needed to ask; have you as a couple taken a pre-marital inventory?
Prepare-Enrich, a program we offer at thinkmarriage.org did a study to assess the difference their workshop would make in the lives of those getting married. Here’s what they found out: PREPARE scores from 3 months before marriage could predict with 80-90% accuracy which couples were separated and divorced from those that were happily married. These findings not only demonstrate the predictive validity of PREPARE, but its potential utility in identifying high-risk couples who could benefit from more intensive premarital counseling.
This couple can do much more than just hope things will work out. They can take tangible steps to know that they have a great chance at a great life as a married couple. If this is similar to the life situation you are in, or if you are considering marriage, thinkmarriage.org does offer pre-marital education on line.
For those who would like to marry some day, we offer How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk (Jerkette) workshops. There is also an excellent book by the same name if attending a workshop doesn’t work for you.
Individual and couple relationship coaching is also available.
We often hear from people very nervous about future relationships because of divorce or how they were treated in the past. Our workshops and coaching are an excellent tool to give you concrete, strategic tools to understand what to look for in a relationship…and when to put on the brakes!
Whatever your need, we are here to assist you in having a wonderful, healthy relationship.
Can anyone relate? Why not make a blog comment!
Whatever your need, we are here to assist you in having a wonderful, healthy relationship.
Can anyone relate? Why not make a blog comment!
2 comments:
My husband and I are different in so many ways as far as our personality goes, but our marriage works because we're equally yoked (of the same faith with the same heart vision).
I think divorce is high because people enter into marriage with preconceived notions of what things will be like and yoking themselves with people they never should have yoked themselves with in the first place. Marriage is a covenant and if both parties understand that and are willing to make God the center of it all..divorce wouldn’t happen.
Look for example at other countries where it is the families who find matches and arrange the marriage. Divorce rate is extremely extremely low. Compatibility (equally yoked) is a part of it… but again, so is the understanding that the two have entered into a covenant.
Dear Hope,
Thanks for your comment. Faith can often be a glue for marriage...and it's still a good idea to work on your marriage too. Keep blogging!
Michele
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